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FEELING BODY

by Nyokabi Kariũki

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      $7 USD  or more

     

  • Cassette + Digital Album

    Type I cassette tape, includes 3-panel J-card featuring artwork by Serena Seshadri. Only 100 copies available!

    Includes unlimited streaming of FEELING BODY via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Limited Edition Art Booklet
    Book/Magazine + Digital Album

    Limited edition booklet including lyrics, and writings on "FEELING BODY". Features commissioned poetry and artwork from Anna RG and prose from Yaz Lancaster.

    All profits from book sales will be donated to #MEAction in partnership with Body Politic, a queer feminist wellness collective that hosts the COVID-19 Support Group.

    24 Pages. Color. Hand-sewn binding. 50 copies.

    Includes unlimited streaming of FEELING BODY via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

  • Limited Edition Cassette + Booklet Bundle
    Cassette + Digital Album

    Bundle containing "FEELING BODY" cassette and booklet.

    CASSETTE:
    Type I cassette tape, includes 3-panel J-card featuring artwork by Serena Seshadri.

    BOOKLET:
    Features lyrics and writings on "FEELING BODY". Includes commissioned poetry and artwork from Anna RG and prose from Yaz Lancaster.

    24 Pages. Color. Hand-sewn binding.

    All profits from book sales will be donated to #MEAction in partnership with Body Politic, a queer feminist wellness collective that hosts the COVID-19 Support Group.

    Includes unlimited streaming of FEELING BODY via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

1.
Subira 04:26
2.
feeling body 12:27
3.
fire head 04:47
4.
quiet face 03:10
5.
folds 05:38
6.
Nazama 02:34

about

This record was written after an extended period of illness (long COVID) in 2021, reflecting on how being sick suddenly gave an urgency to my understanding of the body I live in — suddenly seeing my body from the inside out, not the other way around. While writing this, I sought to share my physical and psychological experiences during the period of illness, as well as reflections in the period thereafter — I mark January 2022 as the end of my long-COVID (although there are some persistent, but manageable, aftereffects). In this record, I contend with this time that I became so aware of the body, and noting that even after, there’s a trauma of illness that remains within you, both in the physical places that it existed; and in the mind. However, in the first track, I foretell that I do get better, and in the final track, I confirm it. The music is not only about the pain and the weight accompanied with being sick; but it is about the appreciation of the body, and how it understands hope and patience before we ourselves believe it.

Needless to say, the process of writing a record that was so close to my physical and emotional pain has been a difficult one. I was never sure how close to my pain I wanted to share. Yet, there has been something interesting to remark about the process. To want to share a painful story is to also find curious ways to protect yourself as you do so: looking towards methali (Swahili proverbs) to nourish the lyrics; asking text-to-speech to say phrases you struggle to repeat; recording stream-of-consciousness voice notes so that you don’t have to sit long in thoughts; and to find, in sound — from field recordings, to dreamy improvisations by musical friends — a way to express visceral feelings and noisy thoughts.

Part of this, too, is the thematic undercurrent of water, which, à la my first record, peace places: kenyan memories, was a place of solace during the illness. Field recordings of water in different states — a river in Ngurumo, cracking ice, a tap dripping; being submerged underwater — flow throughout the work, and I also wanted to point towards Kikuyu homeopathy, where river therapy was particularly prescribed to women who were struggling mentally. There’s also a nod to the symbolism of healing water in the biblical context of the River Jordan (in the final piece, “Nazama” — “I sink” in Swahili). Lastly, it is reflected in the artwork for the cover; a painting by South Asian visual artist and dear friend Serena Seshadri, from her collection of paintings, “Someone Between Body and Water”. I couldn’t take my eyes off her work when I saw it. It felt like a reflection of the record: the body being as much water as it is body; and the water being as much body as it is water.

There is a lot to say about being sick, about being sick during a pandemic; about how the world treats you if you are sick for longer than “just a cold”. There is also a lot to say about feeling understood in online communities (I see you and appreciate you, r/longcovid) but not by doctors, and about how things change even when you get better. But I think this is a good place to stop. I am ever in awe of our bodies, and how they keep going, despite and in spite of all the pain we go through in life. In a way, this album is an expression of love, and gratitude, to my own.

-Nyokabi Kariũki

credits

released March 3, 2023

Nyokabi Kariuki - voices (all tracks), clarinet (track 5)
Yaz Lancaster - violin (track 1, 2, 4), voice (track 2)
Michael Denis Ó Callaghan - trumpet (track 2, 3)
Chris O’Leary - drums (track 3)
Ian Fales - double bass (track 6)

Recorded between Potomac, MD and Brooklyn, NY
Field recordings taken in Kirinyaga, Kenya (track 1), Potomac, MD (track 2), and Brooklyn, NY (track 3), and sourced online

Mixed by Noah Horowitz, Nyokabi Kariūki (2)
Mastered by Dan Langa
Album Art by Serena Seshadri
Graphic Design by Alex Ring Gray

a heartfelt thank you to: Noah, Yaz and Michael, ru, Serena, all you awesome folk at cmntx, Lara, Nabalayo, Emmanuel, and my loving & supportive family.

feeling body (track) was supported through a commission by Falling Tree Productions Ltd for ‘Between the Ears: Miniatures’ for BBC Radio 3. FEELING BODY (album) was partially supported by New Music USA’s Creator Development Fund in 2022-23.

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Nyokabi Kariũki New York, New York

Nyokabi Kariũki (b. 1998, she/her) is a Kenyan composer and performer based between New York,
Maryland and Nairobi.

Her sonic imagination is ever-evolving, with compositions ranging from
classical contemporary to choral music, film, experimental pop; and further includes explorations into
sound art, electronics, and (East) African musical traditions.
... more

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